My Dad

I have been thinking very much about my growing up family. I grew up in a family with my mother and father and two sisters. I had a normal family in many ways and chaotic in other ways. During my childhood my Dad and myself were very distant from each other; lived in the same house but had no real heart to heart connection.

I started drinking at 14 and was an alcoholic by the time I was 18, the legal age to drink. This made the relationship between my father and myself even more strained. After years of drinking I ended up in a rehab ran by YWAM. I left rehab and got married soon after.

After getting married I moved to Troon in Ayrshire. My Dad had cancer for a few years and was taken into hospital. Deep down I never coped very well with this situation and just pretended that nothing was wrong. I was deeply hurting inside and never knew how to deal with my inner pain.

He died in July 2000.

I never cried at the time as I tried to put on a mask of being able to cope. One day I realised that I loved my Dad and missed him very deeply. I lived in the same house as him for 20 or so years and never knew him.

I have learned a lesson in life to always tell people you love them while they are still here.

I do not want to spend years in God’s house, the church, and end up not knowing who Father God actually is. I want to build a deeper relationship with the father as at times it can be very distant.

Today I will start to build a deeper relationship with Father God before it is to late.

Will you spend time with Father God today?

Will you go deeper with Him starting today?

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About cleavinghearts

I go to church in Troon Scotland. I want to see men from every nation rise up in Christ and be who they are called to be. I am interested in men getting together to praise and just do men's things. I also want to see women rise above their pain and turmoil so they are free to follow Jesus without the hindrances of their past.
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