I was employed now for the first time in many years. The main problem that I was facing was hating responsibility. I had a deep down fear of making wrong decisions and not being able to cope with the outcome.
I had started the job as a school cleaner because I thought that was all I had the ability to do. This was the wrong decision as it was based on low self esteem. Low self esteem is negative thinking.
The consequences of this decision was having a poor wage, the inability to pay all our bills. I was offered a second job but again it was cleaning only this time it was a supermarket.
Deep down I knew these jobs were based on the wrong thinking. This was actually making things worse. What would the solution to this dilemma be.
Jesus wanted me to give up my life and let Him take control. Making decisions based on the wrong thought patterns is clearly me being in control. I had to hand over my thoughts to Jesus and let Him change my thinking.
This is what my heart longed to do but the fear gripped my heart tightly. This meant having to trust Jesus.
There was another problem I trusted no one not even myself.
The question was would I let go and let God.
Today do you trust Jesus?
If not what holds you back?
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